She wrecked me and I let her. I let her run me, ruin me, take everything and turn it inside out. I did it because I was incapable of saying no to her. I let it happen, because, in the midst of it was the only time I felt something outside of continuous monotony that is the rest of this world.
Holding her was like standing in fire. Amazed by the intensely colored blaze, you are destroyed by it moments later. But those seconds I had her within the grasp of these scarred hands, no words could I fathom to put together. I would do it all again to be so close to something so dangerous. If only to relive the ephemeral moments where I could feel my very soul shutter inside of my body. That is what she did to me.
She reached inside of my chest with those dainty manicured fingers and pulled out my heart, proving to me two things. I could feel love and I could feel pain. I saw that I was alive, if only a moment's time. And in that moment, she controlled everything. And I let her. With a smile on my face.
She destroyed everything in her wake. Breaking everything I ever was into the smallest of fragments. And as fast as she appeared, she disappeared, like a terrible nightmare that no one would believe I had. But I would let her do it again, because never have I ever felt so alive.
No comments:
Post a Comment