NaNoWriMo 2011 Day 29

So many things have gotten in the way of me writing this novel, you just don't know. I will be writing about a few of them in later blog posts. I was ready to throw in the towel yesterday. I just knew that I would never be able to finish on time. But my Nashville WriMos just weren't going to hear any of that noise. I was told to put my fingers to the keyboard and get to typing. As of right now, I'm 5k away from hitting 50,000 words. That is so doable for me. I am so glad that I didn't give up. If I accomplish this, it will be my second win. And it will be so good, because I was able to do it when people told me that I wouldn't be able to.

Is my story a huge mess? Yep. Will it need more editing than any story I have ever written? Definitely. But I did it. I finished it. I pulled it out. And really, isn't that what NaNo is about? Well this post is going to be short because I have a lot of writing to finish between now and lights out tomorrow.

Congratulations to those who have already won. And to those who are still writing, don't give up. You still have one more day left.

Can't afford to lose focus

It is amazing sometimes how one thing, one thought, one sentence can dictate how the rest of you day and/or week is going to be. And that one small thing can spread from one person to the next. And the next thing you know, the room just reeks of it.


So, my STEP 1 date is looming ever closer and someone breathed the word "fail" in my ear. For a moment too long, I latched onto that thought and all the confidence I had built up over the past few months came down like a house of cards. All that time and effort, crushed by one fear, one doubt. Those along with me had the same doubt and for whatever reason and we were all giving into it. One by one, we were all coming down.


I went to run some errands late Friday afternoon and decided that no, I wasn't going to give into this. I wasn't going to have all my hard work be eaten up by anxiety. I wasn't going to stand in faith this long and then give up right at the end. No, I was going to see this all the way through to the end. I was going to continue to work, believe and pray and put away this worrying about what could happen. After I had made that decision, I felt better.


Now with my dark cloud gone and the smile back on my face, I headed back to the study cave. The moment I opened the door, I could feel it. That nervous, panicked, weighted energy that seemed to drag your very spirit down to the floor. The entire place was permeated with it. I didn't even want to walk in. It felt so dreary and hopeless in there. You could just see it on everyone's face. People feeling defeated and ready to throw in the towel. I hoping that over the weekend, those guys get themselves together and this week will be a new week. We can't afford to give into fear at this point. Way too much to lose.


Plus, I am going to buy a plant for the study cave. Those long faces are killing me.